Mindset
“The true art of memory is the art of attention.” Samuel Johnson
There’s a lot of talk out in the world of self-improvement about how to use your time better. How to create better schedules, get stuff done, or be more productive.
Even more important seems to be how you use your time to recover, self-reflect, and take better care of yourself.
Time is a valuable commodity, or currency depending on how you use it. If you give your time or sell it, it’s a commodity, if you use it to barter or trade for something you need, in essence, it is a currency.
Like any currency, it’s a limited resource, and fundamentally, our time on this earth is finite so we should use it well.
But the nuance of time, and its real value is where you place your attention. How connected are you to what you are doing, who you are speaking with, what you are experiencing, or who you are serving?
Attention is the secret sauce of intentional practice and improvement.
There is a great deal of confusion around the 10,000-hour rule for generating expertise, which was made famous by Malcolm Gladwell in his book “Outliers: The Story of Success”.
Gladwell frequently repeated throughout the book that the key to achieving true expertise in any skill is a matter of practicing that skill correctly for at least 10,000 hours.
This was a simple explanation for a rather complicated subject, but the truth is what matters most is not the volume, but the intention and “attention”. Bringing real focus and connection to the task at hand, and as a result, making finite modifications and improvements along the way is what creates real expertise.
Depending on the complexity of what you are doing, and the variability of the circumstances within which one must execute the skill or ability, a longer or shorter runway will be required.
But this rings true in just about every facet of life. Especially when it comes to relationships and interactions. We often hear people talking about listening better.
Be a better listener, they say!
But the bigger question is what is your attention in the conversation? Are you actively listening? Enough that you could reiterate the conversation to someone else shortly afterward?
We have a whole syndrome to blanket explain people’s inability to invest their attention. Attention Deficit Disorder. Can’t focus on what’s important, now!
We’re much better at talking to ourselves. Not to be confused with positive self-talk, most of the time we are downing on ourselves and repeating our negative narratives. The internal dialogue sabotages the act of listening. Instead, we vacillate between thoughts irrelevant to the conversation, and thoughts about our next contribution.
Being present is about bringing your attention to the moment, to what you are experiencing. If you are trying to get better at something, your attention needs to be on the act, not on other things disconnected from the act.
If you want to be connected in someone else’s presence, your attention to them at that moment, no matter how short or long, is essential to the power of the interaction.
While writing this blog, my attention was momentarily diverted to the Netflix Series my wife was watching “The Starting Five”. It follows the backstory of several NBA players during a season. I was struck when watching Lebron James at the end of Episode 4, about the traditions of the Christmas game in the NBA.
What struck me was watching Labron at the end of the game and his interactions with so many different people. Here is one of the world’s greatest basketball players. His time is precious and the demands of his attention are pulled in every direction, and yet, I could see his real presence in every interaction.
I didn’t see someone simply letting people be in his airspace. I saw someone who cared to bring his attention, however fleeting to every interaction he had. From the connections to the players he embraced and wished a Merry Christmas, to their children, and then on to connecting with the numerous members of his family waiting off-court.
Not just saying hello, but remembering something important to them, or just being “with” them for just a moment. I could see his attention in action. Not distracted by the chaos of the environment, but delivering real hugs and handshakes, then redistributing his joy and spirit to a staff member making them feel special.
There’s a reason people become the best at what they do, and it’s not just about working hard or practicing, or doing more than everyone else. The older I get, the more I realize the secret to this type of success is the ability to bring undivided attention to the task at hand whether short or long is required or available.
The task at hand not only being about the work but also being with the relationships that support the work.
Think about the last time you were with someone you looked up to or were inspired by when you spent time with them. I bet that when you reflect, the reason you felt that way was that you truly felt important to them even if it was just for a moment.
Attention is a powerful thing.
Where is your attention being focused?
