The Iterative Process of Life
“Change is inevitable, growth is optional.” John C. Maxwell
This was the quote on the T-shirts we gave the participants of our recent MpwrU Retreat. MpwrU is a life mentorship group that my wife and I steward. We’ve been doing it for over five years now, and this was our second go-round with a retreat for the group.
One of the key things we teach in the program is the idea of reflection, recognition, and re-iteration.
Everyone’s life is about navigating change, sometimes slight, and sometimes dramatic, as change is a constant. One could even argue that without change management, there is an entropic nature to change. A slow downward slope.
Leave a home unattended and return 20 years later. You won’t be able to see the house because of the vegetation around it, and the house will be in disrepair even though nothing has been used or abused by those not living in it.
That’s nature.
How do we prevent our home from deteriorating like that over time? We maintain it. Sometimes we re-new it or revise it.
We look at what is wearing out, we recognize the deterioration, and we replace, repair, renovate and renew.
But this is not as much a process we learn or effect upon ourselves, at least not as practically.
We tend to over-use our bodies and our minds, pushing them to manage the stress and load of our every day agenda’s, or we simply ignore them altogether, hoping they will respond when needed.
Feeling overweight, then go on a radical diet and begin a training regime and expect the system to respond!
Feeling lonely, get a dog and pay no mind to the overwhelming time and budget demand associated with taking care of an animal.
Time is ticking on the clock of life, it’s time to have kids, but what it costs in time and effort is mostly an afterthought. We’ll make it work.
Move halfway across the world to take a new job, family in tow, we’ll figure it out when we get there!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying we shouldn’t have a fitness and health plan, enjoy pets, or children, or go for the new job. I’m just saying we should learn to walk through a process of reflection, recognition, and revision that leads us to our new iteration intentionally.
Let’s take stock of where we are now, what the change we wish to create might look like, assess our preparation and capacity, talk with those that matter, and then make a decision based on who we wish to be, not what we wish to have.
Do we wish to be healthier – what’s it going to take?
Do we want to have a pet – is it feasible?
Do we want to be a parent – what will it mean to be ALL-IN?
Do we want this new job/promotion – How will it make us better and why is that important?
Life is an iterative process. You want to own it, not react to it.
Will there be times when you need to react? Absolutely, plenty! But the more you create intentional processes for growth, the less of the growth will occur as a response, more will be created with your blessing.
“Change is inevitable, growth is optional.” John C. Maxwell
Steward your change.