Mindset
The news this past weekend has caused me to further reflect on judgment.
It’s become the nature of society today, likely always being a part of society and humanity. We love to judge each other, we love to judge ourselves as well.
But when self-judgment becomes toxic or unbearable, our minds look elsewhere to serve our internal need to feel better about ourselves by looking down or at someone else.
I’m guilty, I’ve done it, way too much. Still do it. It’s not an easy habit to shed. It’s in our DNA.
Maybe because our neurological foundation is all about self-preservation, we just naturally need to define our environments, circumstances, relationships, and pretty much anything we need to interact with or be connected.
But most of what we judge today has nothing to do with self-preservation, and everything to do with pushing the mirror away. We want to be right, and we want them to be wrong.
Unfortunately, there is very little right and wrong and a whole lot of grey.
Opinions reign down constantly. Everyone has them, they are like ass-holes…..heard that one before?
I am fascinated by when something like this past weekend’s news occurs, how fast people can leap to conclusions, define what they saw, believe they are right, or demonize others simply through their lens of perspective.
You have to know you don’t have all the information. You have to know you are creating your narrative to satisfy something you already believe, no?
How can we come to so many conclusions so easily without all the information?
Sure, you might share a thought or observation, but to then take the leap of faith that based on that you know there is a conspiracy a plot, or an over-reaching agenda?
That’s judgment, not curiosity.
If we want to change our society and contribute to being better stewards of our world, we need to shift our narrative from judging others to being more curious about others.
More recently, I’ve begun to watch different news sources, cultivate alternative opinions, and listen more to what is being said. I felt I was reasonably good at it, but I needed to re-double my efforts.
Why?
Because the internet drives judgment. Judgment sells. Judgment creates fear, and fear motivates. If we don’t understand something, we become scared of what it might mean or could become. We build a narrative around the information, we categorize it, and we limit it.
We love to define it, because we can manage our feelings around what we know, but we don’t know what to do with the nebulous possibilities….that’s scary.
The truth is we don’t know, there is no perfect, right answer, and most certainly with the limited information we usually have, we have no right to conclude.
We need more information!
How do we get more information….we ask more questions. We look around, explore, remain open, try out different perspectives.
We seek to call ourselves out on what we believe. It’s not easy, but it IS necessary.
We’ve become polarized because polarization creates a false sense of security, but security just the same.
Security is comforting, and comfort is our happy place.
But comfort is also a place of stagnation. If we want to grow, we need discomfort, we need to feel a little out of sorts.
We don’t always have to feel out of sorts, but we also don’t always want to feel comfortable, and worse, feel we are right and they are wrong.
Today, more than ever before, we must be more curious. We must start our conversation with better questions and a desire to better understand instead of telling others what we think or believe we know.
Double down on curiosity, and never stop seeking.
